Light at the End of the Tunnel
COVID Vaccines
It sounds like there is a light at the end of the tunnel when it comes to COVID. There are multiple vaccines that seem promising, which is excellent news!
My brother-in-law, who works in a hospital, will be getting the vaccine next week. People like my husband and I will likely have to wait until spring to get vaccinated. That’s fine, there are obviously people out there that are in more need of it than we are.
Mixed Feelings
While I am happy that our lives will likely be able to get back to normal (though it will be a new normal), I have some mixed feelings about it all.
COVID-19
The one thing that I have liked about COVID was that it allowed me to stay at home and not feel guilty about it. Before COVID, I would usually feel unproductive if I didn’t go to work from my office at the store. I would feel really guilty if I stayed home on a weekday. I would feel as if I was lazy and not contributing to the world (which was true some days).
The odd thing about it is that I tend to be more motivated to work during the evening hours. But, my brain thinks productivity only counts during regular 9-5 hours.
With COVID, tons of people are working from home, so I don’t feel as bad about working from home. I’m not sure how I will feel once more people get vaccinated and start going back to their offices to work.
Friends
It will also be odd for me to start socializing more. Before COVID, I was in a great place as far as having a community of friends. I had a large group of friends from Zumba, of all ages. People that I wouldn’t have met if it hadn’t been for Zumba.
Cancun February 2020
Jeff and I went on a group vacation to Cancun with some of them in February. On that vacation, I literally thought about how great it was to have this group of friends.
I got closer to some of them and overall just felt more comfortable being in a group than I ever had. I don’t usually do well in large groups with my social anxiety. But, since I knew most of them already, it was easier for me.
But now, I don’t feel that same way about many of the people from that group. Based on how many of them have responded and acted during this pandemic, I won’t be going out of my way to see some of them.
It’s incredibly sad for me. I thought I finally had my group of people, but I guess not. I can’t just agree to disagree with the way some people have responded to COVID, the election, BLM, equality, human rights, etc.
The bright side is that I have become closer with some people that I may not have before. So, perhaps I will come out of COVID quarantine with a group of friends that are better for me.
Hopefully, once I have received the COVID vaccine, I can work on maintaining friendships (new and old), continue working on my writing, and continue to work on myself and not feel so bad about working from home (if I choose to continue doing so).
